Don't Trust me!
by SatanAtWork
Summary: Borderline Insomniac, Pro Thief, and compulsive Liar, Selina, has just become best friends with a Joker. What will her world spiral into? With Rich Parents, Chaotic nights, and a love for a Psychopath, what has Selina gotten herself into? JokerXOC
1. And, Here WeGO!

**_Don't Trust me!_**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The dark Knight**

"Where did you find her?"

The small room was damp and cold, voices floated this way and that as the girl sat in the corner. Her eyes were blank, glazed over as her long black hair draped over her face, sopping wet.

Water dropped from the ceiling of the cell, and landed on her head, making the only noticeable movement in the room for days. Ever since she had been dragged into the room not but 3 days ago, food had been slid in, and water cups settled on the concrete, but still the girl sat still.

No screaming, no twitching, shivering, nor a tinkling the girl was even alive. Darkness settled around her, spiders crawling on her legs, up to her hands placed neatly on her knee caps. Moss even grew in the other corners.

"She was just shaking and screaming, we found her in the rain, rocking back and forth on the steps of the courthouse, screaming a name"

The voices were two distinct, stern sounds, which gave the hint they were both professional doctors.

"What name?"

The door to the cell/concrete room slowly creaked open as the two stood in the blinding light. The wet girl just stared at the floor still, the spiders leaping from her hands and onto her food.

They gave her looks of Pity, as they slowly watched the girl reduce to nothing.

"I don't know, the police were more concerned with getting the disturbance out of the rain. The Mayor was no help as he didn't even hear her, or know she was there"

"Poor thing is going to starve"

Poor thing...

The words surrounded her, suffocating her. The words that got whispered to her everyday as the guard dropped food and water.

Poor thing...

"The Poor thing doesn't have a name, isn't in the system, and won't sleep... She just sits there, soaking wet and stares at the floor..."

"Poor thing..."

Something in the girl lit at that statement, it was finally enough. She couldn't stand the pity anymore, she couldn't even remember why she stopped talking, stopped sleeping, stopped eating.

At that moment, her fingers twitched and she slid her feet out straight, putting her hands in her lap.

"Hello? Are you awake?" The voices whispered, one stepping closer. One step, two steps.

Before soon, he was in front of her, and she finally took his hand and allowed herself to be hoisted up and out of the room.

"Do you want dry clothes?"

"No"

Both gasped and looked to the girl who glared at them both with a scowl, her deep silver like eyes narrowing into slits towards them. Something un-natural about her eyes, it was disturbing and un-nerving to the two doctors.

With her sopping wet hair stuck to her skin and dangling down to her elbows, her white strapless gown clinging to her body, and a purple, blue, and black star tattooed to her left outside ankle, she stood up straight.

"I want to go home"

And with that, the girl left.

Out the steel doors and into the continuous rain of Gotham, the girl just turned right on the concrete and strolled home. The Rain pouring down on her head.

With only her dress, her bra, and her boy short panties to her name, she walked down the street, only to bump shoulders with one person who stopped and looked at her through the dripping rain that completely avoided them under their purple and green umbrella.

A man with green hair, a purple suit and a clown like grin drawn on his face.

"Sorry" She mumbled and continued to walk.

"Why so serious?" The man sneered, stepping towards the girl who smirked at him and rolled her eyes.

"I just woke up, decided to walk in the rain"

"Are you heading home?"

"Very inquizitive man you are" she turned and looked to him. And for the first time in this mans life, she didn't gasp or turn away scared, nor laugh and call him a freak, no...

She turned, smiled and crossed her arms.

"I should have you know, I'm a compulsive liar"

"I like explosives" He added.

"Then we should get along, just fine"


	2. Hello Beautiful!

**_Don't Trust Me!_**

**Chapter one:**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Dark Knight**

"What's your name?"

The same sopping wet girl sat in a black chair staring at the same unfashionable clown, both sipping tea in an empty tea shop. The owner cowering in the back, ductaped to a chair and that chair stapled to a wall, far away from the phone.

The counter was blank and the closed sign seen clearly on the door. The cheap blue circle tables were spread out with black chairs in the shape of lollipops or candy canes, over the blue and white checkered floor.

The Joker watched the girl take a sip of her tea from her ugly, porcelain blue tea cup.

"Selina" She stated, putting the cup down and arching her brow at him.

"Now, the hard part is deciphering that as a lie or not" He snickered, cupping his cup and looking at her over the rim before taking a sip. It tasted like dirty water with tea leafs and one cube of sugar, probably dirt mixed in for color.

"Exactly..." Selina whispered, winking at him before looking through the door-way to the kitchen, watching the man jump and start at screaming again, His voice was muffled and slowly trailed off as he ran out of energy.

Selina smirked and waved her tea cup at him, "Hey! Your tea sucks... I make better tea than this!" She shouted at him as he glared and wiggled this way and that only to land face first into the floor, but high in the air.

As she turned to the clown looking man, he was laughing harder than anyone, wiping a pretend tear from his black colored eyes.

"What?" She giggled, kicking him from under the table before standing and walking to the counter, diving over it. Doing a secret ninja move of dropping and rolling into a crouch, she stole a towel from the tea mans cabinets and began to dry her dress.

"I know, I know! You want me to pay for it!" Selina giggled, looking to the man in the chair that continued to scream. She rolled her eyes and threw the sopping wet towel at him as she took another and dove back over the counter and rolled back to her seat.

"You look really stupid doing that" The man chuckled, looking at her like she was stupid. He had never seen a woman quite like her, she didn't mind the face paint, or the obvious scars, the horrible color coordination, or how he broke in, tied up the owner and poured them tea.

"You know, I don't let strangers insult me!" She laughed, sitting down in the chair with the towel soaking up the last of the water in her dress.

"They call me the Joker" He smirked.

"Is that supposed to impress me?"

The Joker looked at her as she rung out the long black/brown hair of hers, her short bangs already dry across her forehead.

Her dress was white and when soaked, clung closely to her body. It was tight around her chest then had a small thing of blue and purple lace under her chest, with a bow dangling, wet and limp, over the bottom part of the dress that was plain and thin material. It was easy to see her underwear that, of course, was white, and her strapless bra that was white as well.

"Do you like the color white?" The Joker retorted, crossing his arms and resting his gloved hands on the biceps of his arms.

"It's the color of innocence," She giggled, smiling at him before crossing her arms and legs, "Plus, I wore a lot of white when I was 12 till I was 19, when I moved"

"Why?"

"Because I could, that and I only wore white,"

"You're lying"

"I have a tendancy to do that" She stated and stood, dumping her cup on the ground before setting the cup on the table, "But I must really find a room to stay the night in"

"Why not come home with me" The Joker sneered, draping an arm around her shoulders. She rolled her eyes and picking up his hand and dropped it back at his side.

"I'm not that much of a hoe" She stated and pulled the door open, "However... if you offer up dinner and a warm bed, I might be obligated to entertain you"

The Joker stopped and looked at her as she winked before bursting out in mad laughter at his face. Usually he did the hitting on, and the dirty jokes, who was this girl? Really!

"You know, it would be really interesting to play Bullshit with you" The Joker whispered in her ear as she turned, poked him on the nose with a smile.

"I always win that game... Rain check" She laughed and jumped out into the night sky were it finally stopped raining after days of straight down pour.

The Joker handed her a card, smiling and bowing slightly as he did before walking off with a jolly tune escaping his lips. Selina stuffed the card in her bra before finding a taxi.

Another sleepless night in view, she had the man drive her to the closest apartment buildings. Ignoring his random flickering eyes to her chest and legs, he drove on to the cheapest, nearest buildings as she exited and gave him a black eye in return.

"You Whore!" He cried as she raced from the car, laughing at him covering his throbbing eye.

As she got to the back, she climbed to the top, empty apartment and jumped inside, ignoring the spider webs and the ants that scrambled across the floor, she treaded to the door and opened it. And locked it.

"Now... What should I do in my empty apartment?" She whispered as she sat on the wooden floor, and stared at the moon rising up. It must be about midnight, maybe past it.

As she pulled the wallet from her bra, she looked at the ugly I.D. of the Taxi man.

"Idiot" she snorted, and broke the card into a million pieces, scattering them out the window that she left open. The Moonlight was perfect lighting.

Credit Cards, 500 cash inside, pictures of nude women, the same old, cliché wallet of a dirty, Gotham city Taxi driver.

She would just spend all his money in the morning, buying all she needed. It would be perfect, until someone found out about her living in the apartment, not owned by her.

Selina lied back on her back, hands behind her head as she stared to the ceiling, thoughts coming back to her.

Why had she been in that concrete room? She had completely let her mind wipe itself clean except for the memories from years before. Between her school years and the reason she was in the room.

The hardwood under her no longer creaked, as Selina looked around for something to twiddle with, or something to use to form a make-shift key. It had a fridge that hummed softly, a counter with a frumpy sink, and a stove.

"I guess I will have to learn to cook" Selina laughed to herself as she laid back down from her small exploration.

Finally...3 am, she fell to a black, dreamless sleep.

**_---S---J---_**

6 Am, she jumped up completely refreshed and rushed from the room. Jumping from floor, she walked from the room with her, 'New' wallet in hand, and asked the person behind the desk for an apartment.

Paying for 3 months, 200, she smiled and snatched the key, stuffing it in her bra.

"I need clothes"

This is what Selina liked about new towns, new places, no one knew her!

As she walked out, and down the street, she got weird looks. Stares at not only her bare feet and all white attire that was air dried and fluffier than ever, but at her humming happy tunes that no one understood.

Selina walked into a shop, wiping them out of all their white sun dresses with bows on them or any kind of blue or purple additions, bought 2 full outfits that included jean shorts and blue and purple tank-tops, Peace sign necklace, and a head band like she usually wore with a blue flower on top.

Paying with a credit card, she smiled when she learned it wasn't cancelled.

"Need a new closet?" The blond cashier laughed, looking at Selina who smiled and nodded.

"My ex husband burnt down my house after I won the law suit... My poor clothes got all burnt out... good thing the stupid ass-hole is in jail" Selina stated through her teeth, grinning at the girl whose jaw dropped before she clapped her hands.

"Power to ya, lady, he never getting out?"

"No! I sent his ass for endangerment, and proof of him beating me" She waved to the blond who watched, more like gawked, as Selina strutted from the store.

Of course she lied through her teeth, but... that's how she was.

Then in the furniture & Appliance store, she nearly spent 100 thousand dollars on the other credit card.

"Wow, moving in for the first time?" The teenager at the front asked as he added up the whole bed set, dresser, throw rug, Table set, all the appliances, plus lamps and the bug replant.

"My mother died, I can't live in that house knowing she killed herself in the living room. But I don't have the heart to take her stuff, so I left it to my brother and got an apartment" She laughed, watching the burly men lift and carry the objects to the truck.

"Ohh! That's terrible" The Cashier whispered as Selina shrugged.

"I got over it... I'm a tough woman" she walked out, clothes bag in hand, handed her address to the men in the truck and skipped on home. Letting them in when they arrived 30 minutes later (She used that to clear out all the spiders and ants), and found her new home perfect.

"Thanks, Harold Granofski, I really needed it." She giggled as she slid the credit cards into the pockets of the truck men, and stashing the last of her cash.

"Wow... I love what you've done with the place"

Selina looked to the window where the Joker sat peacefully on the ledge, watching her put away her new clothes.

"You should, I had to mug a poor, rich, grandma to get all this!" She stated, bumping her drawers shut with her hip. She didn't even care that he had just found her out of the blue and was now in the window that she climbed through last night.

"I brought cards" He smirked, climbing in the window and playfully pushing past her as he sat at the table, beginning to shuffle.

"Ohh, B.S... it's only fun when you have more than 2 people" She whined, pulling out the change from her bra. The Joker watched in astonishment as she pulled out all her cash, jewelry from the stores (Stolen), and his card, placing it on the table and finally looking at it for the first time.

"How much do you keep in that thing?" He joked, as she hid the money in a drawer of the kitchen.

"You'd be surprized" She whispered in his ear as she reached over him to grab her keys. The Joker stood and turned, pushing beside her.

"So, Whom do you want to invite to our game then?" The Joker snickered, "Your friends from the white phase?"

Selina smirked, and went to retort when a knock rang across her door.

"SELINA? SELINA HONEY, IT'S ME, YOUR MOTHER!"


	3. Come on! HIT ME!

**_Don't Trust Me!_**

**Chapter two:**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Dark Knight**

"Oh Shit!" Selina growled, looking to The Joker and huffing. She remembered her mother, Oh! she remembered her alright, and if she liked the Joker in the least, she wouldn't let him meet her. She was such... Such... Such a bitch!

"Hey, you gotta go" She whispered, poking him in the chest and walking toward the door, mumbling words along the lines as in 'How the hell did she find me?'. The Joker rolled his eyes, walking to her window and stepped out, jumping down onto the rails and disappearing.

Selina sighed with aggravation, she liked the Joker, he was quirking, demented, and she had a feeling that he was sadistic. Plus, he wore make-up, CLOWN make-up, anyone who wore that crap and survived this long with those scars deserves props. Or, at least, that is how Selina saw things.

Opening her door, she saw her mother skitter in, swatting away grabby, dirty men in the hall with her purse, her father marching in behind her, slamming the door. Selina sighed and locked the door, waiting for the large shouting and ground shaking debates from her California, rich, bimbo parents. See, this was her white phase.

When she moved to Gotham, she was hoping to get a real life, it never happened. Somehow they always found her, ALWAYS!

"What do I own the pleasure of your company?" Selina hissed.

"Selina, you're 24, you broke out of your ...HOME, 2 years ago and dropped off the face of the earth! We found you locked up in an Asylum, and went to get you to find you just... Walked out! And now you live in a dump like this, well furbished! Great job honey, I really did teach you how to decorate well! BUT! That's not the point! We haven't talked, seen, or heard from you for 5 years, and that's how you greet us?" Her mother poured out, seemingly on one breath. Selina was surprised she didn't gasp for breath, but her mother had practice.

Being the Governors wife means you have long, endless meetings having to talk and few breaths of air!

Selina rolled her eyes and walked to her mother, allowing her to hug her tight and shake her a bit before looking to her father who pulled her into a stiff embraces.

"Hello Mother, Father... What a pleasure" Selina groaned in a dull, flat tone.

Her mother squealed with joy then went around checking the decoration aspects of her shabby Apartment.

"Selina, you know the doctors still want you back in the home... your mind still isn't right, plus I'm still sure as hell you don't sleep more than 3 hours a night" Her father started, "Selina, please, atleast go in for the normal appointments"

And here we go, Selina thought to herself, I broke out of the mental institution, got locked up in another for a measly 4 days, now I'm here and they still think I'm a psycho.

"Come on! I'm not crazy!" Selina snapped, stomping her foot like a brat and marching over to her mother and pulling her over to her father. It was time they left. She had enough of them!

"It's time you two left" Snarling, she pointed to her door and glared at them both.

A borderline Insomniac! Psh! Because she didn't sleep 8 hours like them, she was some kind of crazy!

A compulsive liar! Okay! That one was true, and she knew it all too well. However, when has that ever been a bad thing, it kept boys from getting close and it kept her from gaining friends who were people like her parents.

A public Menance! She had to admit she was really good at stealing objects, breaking and entering, and ripping objects right from under people's noses, despite the fact she never had to see as her parents were rich before her father became the governor.

Selina watched them leave, no way in hell was she ever going to go to those damn meetings with the shrink. She slammed her door, locked it and fluffed her wavy brunette hair from her face and walked to the kitchen, debating take out or learn to cook?

"I will learn... tomorrow" She whispered and pulled out the phone she bought, and dialed the number for the chinese place down the street. Her stomach growled louder and louder as it rang, until the crude voice of the asian picked up.

"Hey! I want sesame chicken, the crap puffs, and a small thing of rice... yes I want egg rolls... yes soy sauce too..." After giving them her address, Selina looked around and sighed.

She would need something to entertain her for the days to come. A job that she enjoyed a lot... Now what was she good at?

Just then the door bell rang and she opened it only to look at a man in a monkey suit, holding the bag of food. He pushed her aside, dumped the food on her table and turned to her. Selina felt her face twitch, why was everyone fucking with her today?

"Hey, Buddy! Get the hell out!" she snarled only to turn and see a blond like man walk in, flipping his curls as he strode in like he owned the place. The black eyed taxi driver following, giving Selina a glare down that she won as he turned away and cowered beside the blond, tall, tan, Italian like man.

"Maroni, that's the chick! she stole all my money and my wallet!" He growled, pointing at Selina but not looking at her. Selina went to slam the door when she saw the knocked out Chinese man at the end of the hall.

Shutting it she put her arms out, "Search me, you won't find his damn wallet" She stated, "Why would I steal your fucking wallet?" She added as the man in the monkey suit checked her, stopping at her chest and crotch longer than the other parts. When he went to go down a second time, she turn and smashed him in the eye.

"I didn't let my Shrink do that, don't think you can get away with it" She hissed under her breath and stepping over the almost bawling monkey.

"Hey! You can't do that!" The taxi man shouted but Selina was sitting down opening up her food and putting a napkin in her lap.

"Look! I ordered food, and I'm going to eat it... so, you three can get out of my apartment" She growled.

"You can't order the mob around" The stupid man cried only to get shut up by Salvatore Maroni himself.

"Harold, shut up!"

Selina rolled her eyes at his rolling accent as the man strode over and slammed hand shut over her chicken. Rude! She thought to herself as she pushed back and looked at the guy then swatting his hand away.

"Look here slut, you give the man back his wallet and we will be out of your hair" The blond stated.

Selina didn't like that one bit, she stood, crossed her arms and spoke, "I don't have it, you can search and you'll never find his dumb wallet here, I will admit to giving the guy a black eye, but he deserved it, looking at a lady like that! You both are pigs! GET OUT!" She snarled and as hard as she could, she kicked Salvatore Maroni a good kick in the crotch. Throwing the monkey and him out of her door and throwing the taxi man out her window, she locked her door and called the police.

**_---S---J---_**

That night, after laying in her fresh bed, she finally pulled out the book she swifted from the lady in the lobby. It was some kind of pirate book, but it was fine. As she flipped to a new page, a small box landed in her bed, right from the window.

Putting the book away, she opened the golden box and found a small clown figurine with the Joker's make-up crudely drawn on, making Selina laughed and place it beside her bed side table. Tiredness finally catching on, she fell asleep at 4 in the morning.

At 7 am she shifted over and found a body laying there. Jumping nearly out of her skin, she opened her eyes and found dark ones looking back at her.

"Hello Beautiful, did ja' miss me?" The Joker giggled, patting her cheek roughly before getting out of her bed and sitting in a chair, propping his feet up on the table.

"Oh! I missed you so much, I had dirty dreams of you all night" Selina laughed, sliding from the bed and making her bed.

"You're too proper" The Joker mumbled through left off Chinese. Selina patted down her pillow before turning to him and shrugging. Old habits die hard.

She snatched her food from him and ate it, in her see through night gown that was white, of course, with white panties underneath with small blue stars on them, stars also on the top of her gown.

"You probably wonder why people call you a whore?" The Joker stated, standing and tugging on her dress a little so that more cleavage was exposed. She only slapped him on the chest, playfully, and finished up her horrible Chinese food.

"Hey, Beautiful... I have a question to ask... you want to come play a game with me and my friends?" The Joker asked, standing behind her and putting his gloved hands on her stomach as she washed her hands.

"Hmm, what is this game called?" She asked, turning and crossing her arms.

"Steal a bus and drive it into the front of a mob bank" He whispered, pulling her closer to his chest as she turned and smirked, poking his nose and escaping his grip.

"I'd love to" She whispered, stripping there and then, pulling on new panties, and a new bra, pulling on her jean shorts and a tank-top, putting her head band on her head, her necklace over her neck and looking to the Joker in confusion.

"Do you do that all the time, Beautiful?" He asked, pulling her out her door, both stepping over the now, nude, and still unconscious Chinese man.

"I'm not very modest."

"I've got to hang around you more often" he laughed, stuffing a mask on her face, and smacking her butt as they got into a van.


	4. I HATED my father!

**_Don't Trust Me!_**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Dark Knight**

Selina sat in van, watching the other men look at her weird. The Joker didn't climb in, he waved with his mask on and left for the corner.

That's when the van jolted, waking the girl completely up. What was she thinking? Selina looked at the others. There were three total in this van, one with blue hair in a Mohawk form, a clown mask with swirls and a blue tipped nose, one with shaggy brown hair with an average mask, and one with pink hair in puffs on his head with splatters on his mask and a pink polkadot on his nose.

"So... Where are we stealing the bus?" Selina asked, watching the blue haired one drive the van towards the butt end of town. Selina knew what was there. Houses, the Rich and famous, schools.

They weren't... They weren't going to steal a bus from a school? Really! Come on, that was middle school!  
Selina looked to the envelope in her lap, the one the Joker left, and began to rip it open. Come on, he couldn't be that stupid, or sadistic? She felt like she knew him, he couldn't be that crazy. Besides, he wasn't really thinking of robbing a bank, was he?

The Letter went like this:

_Dear Beautiful, _

_On this game, only two of you will survive, you and one other clown. The two excentric ones are going to help you steal a bus, then you are to shoot them, push them out of the bus and have the other drive the bus._

_The one who knows he will live will have a gun on him._

_Pull this off Beautiful and there will be a threat instore for you_

Selina gasped and began to furiously rip up the paper, stomping on it and kicking the pieces randomly about the bottom of the van.

"THAT BASTARD!" She screamed, glaring at her hands. He was that crazy! He was serious! He wanted her to kill people, which Selina had never done. She had stolen clothing, and objects from people, but never where they could see, and she wasn't Psycho. This was a bad idea, she had to get out of there.

However, just as she went to stand and jump out the van, it jerked again. It had stopped, not a good sign. She looked up as the two colored clown pulled her out with them. If she was going to survive this, she had to go through with it till she could get free!

"Okay... which one" she stated as the clowns pointed to the bus in the back that was still boarding kids.

"Okay... how do we get the kids out" She added, sliding behind a tree and eyeing the bus as if she was a secret agent. The two on her side had gun on their sides, and the other, behind her, had a gun. She couldn't get out now, she would have to get on the bus and kill them all, if she could handle it.

"Like this!" with that, the pink haired clown threw a smoke bomb into the window of the bus. Screaming and mindless running, the kids rushed from the bus as the four crept up the back and snuck in. Watching the blue haired man stab the bus driver, he turned and shot the pink haired man, and pushed him from the bus.

"Boss said, once he was done, get rid of him" Blue haired guy blurted out as the other two looked at each other than shrugged. Selina sighed to herself and watched with pity, as they ran over the clowns body and rushed from the school building and onto the streets. Once Blue haired got them to the city limits, he was shot and pushed out the bus.

This time, Selina had shot him, as the other forced the gun into her hands. Steadying herself, she let the other get into the drivers seat. Maybe, they were bad people! They had to be to just steal a bus from kids willy-nilly!

Selina felt stupid now, she had made friends with a mad-man, she should have seen this coming.

"Okay, here we are!" Suddenly the back crashed into the bus and the plain man went to open the back for the other.

Selina went to run from the bush but The Joker instantly jumped in, shut the door with the loads of cash and smiled at her, patting her shoulder before getting behind the wheel.

"Why... Why didn't I die?" She mumbled, standing and sliding to the seat behind the Joker as he somehow got the bus out into the street and in-between other busses. Seeing the kids and other stuff, she cringed a bit and tried to hide her worry as she pulled the mask off.

"Because I like you Beautiful... besides, I got some cash for you!" He began to laugh madly only to stop as they pulled over. Selina knew it was now or never.

"I don't need it! I just want out!" She hissed, pointing the gun at his temple as he froze then smirked and looked at her. Instantly he had smacked the gun from her hand and pinned her wrists together, glaring into her eyes.

"Beautiful, did you plan that little joke to be funny?" He hissed, narrowing his eyes on her.

"No! Do I look like someone with a god damn plan?" She hissed, spitting in his face. That's when he switched hands and slugged her right in the face. Selina fell to her knees, gasping for breath as her face began to burst in pain.

"Good, because I just HATE schemers!" He laughed, now suddenly in a delightful mood, skipping to the back and nailing her with a bag of cash. Selina felt herself be pulled up by her collar and pushed out. Now she saw it was her appartment building, and he was pushing her towards the ladder.

"Keep your money!" She hissed, throwing it back at him and grabbing onto the ladder behind her, just in case.

"What's going on Beautiful, don't like me no more?" He sneered, dropping the bags as Selina back her back fully into the cold iron.

He was a psycho with a great right hook. Selina needed out of this relationship, now!

"No! Clowns scare me" she retorted, "Besides... I don't like killing people" She blurted out, for once, the truth. She couldn't get their faces from her mind as she saw all their little masks roll from their faces.

"Beautiful, I don't think you understand..." He got close, and before Selina could move, he had her by the neck and raising her off the ground, "You don't have a choice!"

"My name is Barbie, and I do too!" She snarled, smashing her flip-flop into his face, watching him tumble backwards. Grabbing for the ladder, she hoisted her up and began to climb as fast as she could. Selina had gotten to her room and shut the window, locking it and was looking for something to cover the window when The Joker broke the window.

"Beautiful, you ain't so beautiful anymore!" He snarled, pulling out his switch blade as Selina grabbed the first slash and stab knife she could find.

"You weren't this big of a freak before" She snarled, standing behind the table, one hand on chair and one holding the knife.

"I'll show you a freak!"

Suddenly the table slammed into her waist, pinning Selina up against her counter as she pushed it away from her, he grabbed her by the nook of her head, hair and all, she threw her to the ground. Selina screamed and slashed at him, feeling a disgusting spill of blood drip on her face only to recieve a punch in the face and his hands grab her by the hair and drag her to her feet.

He turned on the sink, after banging her head against the counted and giving her a sickening nose bleed. Once full, and Selina felt her world a little clearer, he pushed her head under the water, holding it there until she stopped wiggling.

As he expected her to be dead, he pulled her up, she ripped around and sliced a gash in his arm and stood, sopping wet and angry.

"You look exactly like you did when we first met!" He laughed madly only for Selina to grab a pan and throw it at him.

"GET OUT!"

"You can't get rid of me that easily!" He chuckled, stepping closer as Selina grasped for another pan to throw. Only then did her lights go out.

_**---S---J---**_

Groaning and seeing if everything worked, Selina's world came spinning back into play. Gasping, she shot forward, off her kitchen floor, only to whimper in pain and slid back down on her back. Obviously her throat still worked, her arms too, and she wasn't dead.

"Well, that's an encouragement" she whispered to herself as she slowly pushed herself to a sitting up position and made a damage control check-list. Her face burned like no other, her arms were cut up but crooked scabs covered them, and her legs looked like purple polka-dots.

When she slid to her feet, she found toast made, for atleast 7 people, with butter and jelly, with a note.

_Eat up Beautiful, you're going to need your energy!_

She screamed out loud and threw the paper into the sink, dumping out the water and throwing on the disposal.

"Selina! Please open up! It's your mother again!"

She was so mad and hungry, she didn't notice her mother knocking/pounding on her door.

Great, what was she going to do to explain her current state to her mother? Selina sighed, stuffing a piece of toast in her mouth as quick as possible and walked/limped, to the door. Opening it, she watched her mother leap in the room and slam the door for her.

"The man downstairs said he heard screaming and crashing! I wanted to make sure.... you ... were okay" it wasn't till mid sentence; she actually looked up and saw her daughter with all her glory.

"Hello mother" Selina whispered, walking past her, then forced herself to limp to the kitchen where she scarfed down another piece of toast.

"Who... Who did this to you honey?" Her mother cried, reaching out then pulling back, not wanting to touch her daughter. The woman feared if she touched her daughter, she would shatter into a million pieces. The blond pushed her brilliant curls from her face as she watched her daughter picking up pans and knives, putting them on the counter and finally switching off the disposal.

"Mother, it's none of your business whom I have fights with" Selina whispered, setting the table right and walking to her bed, making it firm and straight once more. Seeing as it got ruffled from the night before. Selina would have to have it cleaned. (It got ruffled when she trampled over it to get into the kitchen, away from the Joker.)

"Have you seen yourself?" Her mother hissed, grabbing Selina's good wrist and forcing her pocket mirror into Selina's face. Sighing, she took the stupid object and looked over herself with a sigh.

"I'm going to take a shower" She whispered, walking to the door next to her bed and opening it, looking to the bathroom. Her mother whispered something to herself before standing in the door way as her daughter turned on the cold water, stripped of her clothing and limped herself into the shower, shutting the curtain between them.

"Honey, you... what ever relationship you're in, you've got to get out" The blond whispered, looking at the bare bathroom, Selina had not gotten to it yet.

"Mother, what do you think got me into this mess! I tried to!" Selina growled. The Joker wasn't this horrible until he showed his true colors. Now, she wanted out, instead of before she was clouded over by the flirting and the fun of having a bad boy give her interest.

"Selina, your father and I want you to rest today, just heal up, and... Then tomorrow night, we're going to the Mayor's Galla, showing off his new wife and family... We are coming to get you at 3 in the afternoon, so be dressed, sophisticated, please"

That's when the blond left the room, and slammed the front door shut. Selina glared and watched the blood flow across the bottom as she scrubbed the scabs off and cleaned them.

"Damn woman" She whispered as she finally got out and dried. Quickly dressing into clean underwear and bra, she pulled on spaghetti strapped white dress with blue and purple lace on the bottom, in flower designs.

"Well, Beautiful, I hope you like your legs! I made them your favorite colors!"

Selina ripped around and glared at the man walking in from her window.

"Get out!" She snarled, backing up only to trip and fall on her bed. The Joker was instantly on top of her, hands pinned against the bed as he smirked.

"Aww, come on... I just got in Barbie"

"Please, my name is Angelika," She mocked, flipping him off her and walking tot he kitchen.

"Does this mean I can stay" He giggled, sitting on her bed as she finished cleaning up the kitchen. Keeping her mouth shut, she had to think of something. Her whole, go with the flow and something will come to you, didn't quite work. However, Plans were something she was never good at.

"Don't flatter yourself" She growled only to go still when his hands snaked around her waist and pulled her close. That's when a blush rushed across her face, his chin on her bare shoulders. Forcing herself to do something, she washed the dishes in her sink, tossing broken bits over her shoulder and into the trash.

"Well, Da Javu'" He laughed kissing her neck, making Selina shiver and look at him. He smirked up at her and for some stupid reason, she smiled and rolled her eyes.

"Ohh keep quiet, I'm still pissed" She snarled, pulling from him and putting the dishes away.

"Well... maybe this will make you feel better"

Selina went still as a necklace was drapped across her neck. It was a slightly loose chocker, with a blue and purple flower dangling from the pure silver chain. Glitter sparkled through the jewel like petals.

"Wow" She breathed only to turn as the Joker blew a kiss and flew out the window. Glaring, she sighed and sat on her bed. After hours of flickering her eyes from the book to the window, then back again, she finally got the feeling he wasn't coming back. Atleast that day...


	5. We are Tonights Entertainment!

Don't Trust me.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Dark Knight but Selina is my own character!

Selina woke up, with a start. There was someone on her bed, snoring loudly.

"Who the hell?" She grumbled, rolling over to the Joker who began to giggle furiously before putting up a mask in her face.

"NO!" she snarled, pulling back and leaping from her bed. "No! I'm not doing one of your silly missions, ever again!" She crossed her arms, glaring full on only to receive one in return.

"Listen here, Beautiful, I brought the mask, you're putting it on!" He snapped, standing in front of her. Selina scowled, letting her face scrunch up with hatred as she took the mask and threw it across the room.

"Listen here, I don't take your crap!" She spat back, slugging him hard in the chest and walking towards her bed to make it.

"Wrong choice Beautiful"

Selina turned to find a fist in her cheek, flying her over onto the bed. The Joker lept on top of her and pinned her flying hands to the sheets, keeping her legs still with his ankles. She glared at him, feeling the scorching pain in her cheeks begin to flare up more and more.

"Are you going to play nice?" He whispered, narrowing his eyes on her as she scowled and did something stupid. She hocked a lugi, and spat it right in his face, biting hard into his wrist.

"LET GO!" he snarled, throwing her onto the floor and standing, rubbing his now throbbing wrist. Snickering to himself, he put his hands on his hips and shook his head.

"You know, Angelika, you really are confusing. One minute we're great buddies… then you're spitting at me and biting me! I really don't know what to do!" He snickered, grabbing Selina by the ankle as her hazy world began to stabilize.

"Let go" she whispered, wiggling slightly, trying to gain muscle control again only to get a sudden start when her back hit the tile. The Joker snickered, dropping a brush, hair tie and a dress in her face.

"You know what, forget the mask… I have a better position for my beautiful!" He giggled, kneeling and looking Selina dead in the eyes. Looking away from his eyes, she waited for him to laugh and leave her laying on the cold tile. Finally having enough, she stood and pulled on the dress he had for her. It was a simple faerie like white dress with a blue ribbon on the top with a purple bow, plus her necklace dangling from her collar bone.

As she pulled her hair up in a pony-tail, the door opened and the joker instantly grabbed her wrists and forced her out the window.

"Hey! I have to be home for a party later" she snapped, looking at him as he shrugged and looked at her over his shoulder.

"I don't think you'll want another party after this one!" He giggled, pulling her down and into his arms before flinging her into another van. Men sitting there, shivering and cowering were looking at her with pity.

"WHAT!" She snapped, flipping them off. Pulling herself up, she plopped herself on a small bench like sitting thing that everyone else was. That was except the men tied up and laying on the floor in their underwear. Selina didn't want to even ask, she knew what would come if she did.

"I really need to move somewhere else" She whispered to herself as she looked to the Joker leaning back and humming a tune to himself. Why could such a psychotic man be so happy with men crying in their boxers at his feet, men who worked for him cowering, and a girl who never told the truth yelling at him constantly being beat up by him for it.

"Angelika, what are your hobbies?" The Joker blurted out, looking at her interested.

"It's Rachel, and Secretly, I go around stealing everyone's left shoe from their houses and throw them into other people's furnances… then during the day I work at McDonalds" She stated fully serious written on her face as the men let their jaw drop. The Joker burst out into mad laughter, holding his stomach as he leaned forward and laughed into his knees before patting Selina's knees and smiling to himself sadistically.

"I love that about you… now… I'm hungry! PULL OVER!" He snarled, pulling out a large shot gun and looking to the driver who squealed into the parking lot of the McDonalds.

"Maybe we can shoot my manager, he's an ass" Selina laughed to herself as the men just shook their heads at the Joker instantly grinning ear to ear (Not to hard seeing as his scars gave him an extra huge grin), and grabbed her wrist.

"Beautiful, You're just way to much fun!" he giggled throwing her out of the truck. She fell to the ground, skidding her knees slightly, but with a few pants and grumbles under her breath, she stood up and wiped off the blood from her pale knees.

"What was that for! I can get out on my own!" She snapped, glaring at the Joker as he put a hand around her waist and pulled her inside. He rolled his eyes before shooting the ceiling and forcing Selina into the counter.

"Beautiful, the boys are hungry, gets us something to eat" He stated, turned to the cowering people at their seats. "no… Lets not call anyone" He narrowed his eyes on an elderly woman with an even older cell-phone in her hands, shaking and trembling.

"Okay… well… We'll have 8 number 6's with large cokes-"

The Joker turned and whined, "Beautiful, Coke? I don't like Coke!"

"YOU'LL GET STUPID COKE AND LIKE IT!" Selina snarled, making him hold his stomach and cackle.

"Isn't she somethin'?" The Joker joked to a man in a business suit as he nodded vigorously and looked warily at the Joker who laughed and walked around, watching everyone as Selina continued.

"8 frosty's, I'll have a large fry, a chocolate milk-shake.... To go please" Selina batted her eye-lashes at the man behind the register as he nodded and ran to the back to fulfill the order himself.

"What, no food Beautiful?" The Joker mocked, pointing the gun at a lady and her small son in her lap, shaking with the utmost fear on her face.

"You can tell me what to do but what I eat is my business!" Selina stated, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms. "Bossy men" She mumbled as she looked to the kid who ran around like a chicken without his head. Leaning her elbow up against the counter it suddenly hit her as she stood up and looked to the Joker torturing the kid with the barrel of his shot-gun.

"Hey! What about the guys we got tied up!" She shouted, looking at him as he thought about it before shaking his head. Knowing he wouldn't care if they lived or not, and know that she would be busted up for trying to help them, she put herself first. Selfish, but smart, Selina just wanted out and to get out she would have to play his game till she could run.

"Here you go…" Selina smiled and patted the kids head, taking the two large bags in one hand, the drinks in another, nodding her chin for the Joker to follow. He skipped out, after laying the gun over his shoulder and firing off at random.

"COME ON! Leave the poor people alone!" Selina cried, jumping in the van before he could throw her in. she passed small boxes and fries around before handing him his, plus his drink while the others grabbed theirs. Selina sat with her fries and milkshake, completely being ignored by the Joker who was nearly messing up his lip-stick with his chicken sandwich.

"All men eat like animals" she mumbled to herself dipping a fry in the ice-cream then throwing it in her mouth and swallowing, rolling her eyes as the shaking men began to devour their food. "Just glad he didn't ask for me to pay him" Selina added to herself, watching the drive speed off with a mouthful of fries.

Before she knew it, they had stopped and it was nearly night time. She was so screwed. She realized she woke at 2 in the afternoon to the Joker laughing, and they got in the van at 2:50, now it was 5 in the afternoon and she was never going to the party her mother wanted to.

"I'm screwed" She mumbled to herself as the vehicle finally stopped. The Joker burst open the door and pulled her out. Letting her walk a few steps before he grabbed her wrist and forced her chin to look up.

"Wayne Enterprise?" Selina Blurted out, looking at him as if he was stupid, "What do you want me to do, sleep with the guy to get his money?" She laughed.

"No… He's throwing a small shindig tonight… I need you inside for a bit so that you can spot out Harvey's Squeeze… I need Harvey Dent" The Joker giggled, patting her on the back, "We will follow once our stomachs settle" he got back inside before shutting the door behind him and the van roaring off.

"Ohh! Great" she looked around, it was miles away to the Mayor's house where the 'Small' friend party was supposed to be versus this huge party at Wayne Enterprize.

"Mother is going to hate me" she whispered to herself as she went inside with the large mass of people. Once inside she found the Squeeze easy, as she was talking to None-other-than Harvey Dent himself. The white Knight. Psh, yea… more like Blond, blue eyed, bimbo boy who didn't know what was really going on!

Selina smirked to herself and strode right up and introduced herself, "Hey, Rachel right? The name is Selina, Selina Howards" She stated, shaking Rachel's hand. Not needing to lie when she came from riches and everyone here was here for money.

"Oh, Hello, Rachel… right, Selina… I know you! You're the daughter of the Govenor… California, right! Why are you here?" She giggled, smiling at Selina with bright eyes in her jade green dress that flattered her in every-which way.

"Well… My daddy, came to town for a few weeks to help out the new mayor get to ease, Mother and I are just hanging about, trying to make friends and I was just…here to see if I could find some friends" She stated, lying through her teeth as Rachel laughed and nodded.

"Well, this is Harvey Dent" She waved to Harvey who grinned largely, Selina returned it with a sugary smile.

"Selina Howards" She stated, shaking his hand, "Nice to finally meet you" She laughed only to turn towards the doors as the man of the hour came in. Bruce Wayne. After his speech, he seemed to just be talking, so Selina got into the crowd of his fans who talked to him.

"Well, I've never seen you before" Bruce stated, watching Selina stay after the others left Wayne's side and walked different directions.

"Selina… Selina Howards, I doubt you've heard of me, but I'm the daughter of the California governor. My father is very interested in New york, besides he's great friends with the new Gotham Mayor and came over to help out… I'm here to just make friends" Selina added, making sure her lies stayed easy to follow for herself. She didn't want to be making outrageous accusations she could adhere to.

"Oh! I think I have heard of you" He laughed, walking to her right as they crossed the room, continuing to talk. Jokes, debates, interests were shared before they stopped and he excused himself to go talk to Rachel. Harvey looked nervous.

"What's got your behind?" Selina giggled, nudging him as he jumped and looked uneasy.

"I don't know… Um… Have you seen Rachel?"  
"Outside on the deck, with Bruce" She pointed him towards the doors as he nearly sprinted there. Wow, what a scared little man. When Bruce returned, it was like they were best buddies, talking and conversing stories (Leaving out her friend/enemy relationship with the joker and her psychic ward years).

"So… How does such a lonely man survive his days?" Selina asked, looking as Bruce laughed and rolled his eyes.

"I'm not lonely! I have plenty to do" He retorted jokingly, looking at her, "I have work… and…Um…" Selina smirked at him as he huffed slightly, "Your right… It sucks" He stated. His voice deep and caring.

"Well…It's better than my life, I'm constantly getting threats and love letters from obsessed people I don't know, and I'm constantly dressed in stuffy clothing I don't like… I love wearing sun dresses with converses… not Woman suits that are pink with poodle insignia's on them" she laughed, looking at him in the eyes, seeing a spark in him that seemed to be in some one elses eyes that she knew.

No way! She was honestly comparing him to… to the Joker. Why did guys with weird things about them just attract themselves to her.

"Okay… so tell me… what's your secret" Selina whispered, as they were sitting on a couch out of the crowds, sipping white wine.

"What secret?" he asked, waving for Alfred to take his wine.

"You are perfectly content with living in a huge house, off Gotham district, with you and your butler… whom by the way, is your best friend and basically guardian, and you don't have some weird hobby that keeps you from dying of boredom?" Selina mocked.

"I don't…Now if you excuse me! I have a normal thing to do by talking to my friend Harvey Dent" Selina rolled her eyes and watched him leave. That's when The Joker came into the picture.


End file.
